It's not public speaking, spiders, or heights. Although I become significantly anxious when dealing with them, those are not the things that terrify me most. There are three things that top those, and are undeniably the most terrifying to me. Ladies, grab your rosé. I am in the mood to get super philosophical for this post.
1. Having Regrets: Everyday I try to minimize dealing with as many regrets as possible. So for that reason, I tend to put a lot of thought into my decisions just to ensure that whatever outcomes I face, they likely outweigh the what-ifs. Basically it's "fear of missing out" times 100. To me, it's such an awful thing to have to live with heavy regrets. I've watched people I know make poor choices for themselves, and it absolutely shocks me. Life is too short to live with unnecessary burdens as result of foolish choices. I've been the happiest lately because I've been making myself and my wellness a priority. I don't have time for regrets. Do you agree?
2. Feeling Misunderstood: The feeling of being misunderstood makes me cringe inside. For some reason I have a hard time defending myself. And a lot of times, I struggle with coming up with a timely response in my defense. For that reason, I'm often put in the position of being unable to give myself the fair amount of credit when a confrontation occurs. Of course hours later in my head I have the best response, but at the point, it's too late. When I find myself in those types of situations, I feel terribly misunderstood. I can't stand it. Do any of you have some tips for overcoming those fears?
3. Being Alone: I'm sure many of you can relate to this one. I don't mean having a fear of long term independence. I love being in my own company. In fact, in many ways, I am an introvert. I cherish my alone time after a long busy day working with many people. I love getting into my comfy clothes, pouring a glass of wine, snuggling on my couch to watch a movie, or to write, or read a good book. I live for those moments.
But what I mean in this case is having the fear of being alone permanently. I fear not being accepted and loved by another. I crave the feeling of being devoted, of feeling the sense of having a strong and healthy partnership. I fear not having someone to depend on, who will be there for me in all the ways that I need. I haven't found that special person yet, and/or that special person hasn't found me. And I crave that person more than ever. My best friend and I talk about this all the time. We truly believe we have so much to give, yet at times we feel so empty inside because we have no one to pour our hearts to. Don't mean to sound melodramatic here, but my best friend and I fear that we may never find that special person because no one has shown a desire to reciprocate their feelings to us in the same way we want to. Please do share your thoughts on this. My bestie and I are all ears.
Thank you for your time, ladies and cheers!